Romano's Swear Box!
by Kat The Maniac
Summary: Romano is at a world meeting, pissed at the world, and Spain comes up with the 'fantastic' idea of a swear box! I dunno about you, but I think whoever gets their hands on that thing will be so rich, they'd be able to pay off America's national debt!
1. Roma's Swear Box

Romano grumbled as he stepped into the world meeting.

Why was he here?

His brother could do this shit.

He wanted to go home.

But of course he couldn't, he was saddled with going to this boring ass meeting, he just hoped he didn't run into that to-

"LOVI!"

Fuck.

Spain walked over with a smile so bright it put the sun to shame. He flung his arm around Romano and laughed "Como esta mi Tomatiqo?" Romano growled and pushed Spain off of him "FUCKING BASTARD!" Spain gave a soft tsk and said "Romano, your language is horrible." Lovino growled and started walking towards the empty seat next to his brother, but was suddenly pulled back once again by Spain. Spain laughed and told him "You know I have the perfect idea!" He turned Romano around so he would be facing the right way while rumaged around in his pockets, Romano glared as he felt the wasted seconds tick by.

Spain gave a tiny smile as he pulled out what looked like a tiny treasure chest, Romano raised and eyebrow and shook his head "Dumass I'm not pla-"NONONO LOVI! This isn't stupid! It's a swear box! Everytime you swear, you have to put in a peseta!*" Romano's eye quirked again and he seemed to be confused as he asked " So, everytime I swear, I put in a euro?" Spain nodded like an excited puppy and said "Si!" Romano sighed, but begrudingly took it and stuffed the tiny box in his pocket.

He was about to start talking about how this was a stupid idea that was never going to work when he heard Germany yelling about the meeting starting. Romano shot him a heated glare and muttered "Potato bastard..." Realizing what he had just done, he sighed, pulled out his wallet and dropped a coin into the tiny treasure chest. He sat down, and saw Spain giving him a smile and a thumbs up. Damn Spanish Dickhead.

** _ 2 WEEKS LATER._**

"Romano?"

"Uh yeah Spain, I have a problem..."

"What is it?!"

"I cleared out my national bank."

* * *

**OKAY YEAH. I LOVE HETALIA AND I DO PLAN ON DOING SOMETHING SERIOUS ONE DAY. BUT I DID THIS OUT OF PURE BOREDOM PLAIN AND SIMPLE. I'VE HAD IT ROLLING AROUND IN MY HEAD A FEW DAYS AND DECIDED TO WRITE IT OUT. Also, I've got an alternate ending, if anyone actually cares about this one, (for me, caring is getting like at least 3 reviews) I'll upload that too. ANYWAY HAVE A NICE DAY.**

*** LIKE I DUNNO APPARENTLY SOME OLD SPANISH CURRENCY, I DIDN'T DO MUCH RESEARCH.**


	2. Lovi's Abstinence

**_Picking up from the moment Spain answers the phone..._**

"Hola! This is Spain!"

"SPAINCOMEQUICKTHERE'SSOMETHINGWRONGWITHFRATELLOHEISNTTALKINGANDIMSOSC-"

"ITALIA! Calmate!"

"Just come quickly!"

Click

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Spain hung up and stared at the phone with a frown on his face. That was weird.

WOAHHOLYCRAPALINEBREAKTHATMEANSWESWITCHPOVS

Italy cried and stuffed another forkful of pasta in his mouth. It was so quiet! This was stressing him out! Why couldn't Romano ju-

"LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! FELIIIII! WHERE ARE YOU?" "Oh ve-! It's Spain." He scurried down the stairs, and dragged Spain up the stairs without an explanation. Spain was used to his erratic behavior, and he usually just went with the flow anyway. So here he was. Flowing while a crazed Veneziano dragged him up the stairs. The Italian was babbling but he couldn't understand a word of it until they stopped in front of the door of Lovi's room. Italy shoved him in front of the door and ran away squealing.

Okay.

Spain grabbed the doorknob and thought about what'd he'd find when he walked in.

Well.

_Tomatoes all over place._

_Books about the Italian Mafia being chucked at the wall._

_His night stand in broken splintered pieces._

So far he'd had 3 nightstands in the past 2 months.

They didn't even bother matching it with the rest of the furniture anymore.

Spain shook his head and muttered "Focus Espana! This isn't anything you haven't dealt with!" He hesitantly twisted the door knob and muttered a soft "Loviiii..." as he walked into the dark room.

And what he saw...

OH What he saw.

As he walked in, he stubbed his toe on a tiny piggy bank. His eyes widened as he realized.

Holy crap this is full.

He looked around the floor, and his eyes went the size of tomatoes in June.

They were all over the floor.

All full.

Stacked on the bookcase, littered on the desk, chairs, rugs, boxes. Yes even nightstand, which had miraculously not been destroyed yet was covered in filled tiny plastic piggy banks

Ai Dios.

He looked towards the bed and saw the most horrifying sight in his life.

Romano was smiling.

Usually he loved it when Lovi smiled, it was rare, small, and cute, just like the person behind the smile.

But this..

This was either 'I have peroxide jelly on my teeth' or 'I've turned into a psychopath and murdered your cat.'

Probably the latter.

Spain stood like a deer in headlights, while Lovi sat on his bed Indian style, smiling like he'd enjoy running it over.

"Hello Antonio."

Romano's eye twitched slightly and Spain opened and closed his mouth several times as he thought of something to say.

'What the hell' kept cycling.

Spain finally decided to take a tentative step towards Romano while asking "Is everything...okay?" Romano twitched again, and his smile widened as he babbled "Of course I'm fine! Why wouldn't I be fine Tomato bas-" He made a noise not really relatable to humans. He then twitched a bit more violently and placed a coin into a tiny box that had been sitting in between his legs. Spain caught sight of the box, and couldn't help laughing.

Bad idea.

Romano's head jerked violently as he spat through clenched teeth "WHAT. Is so funny Antonio." Spain walked over to Romano, not really scared anymore and sat in front of him. He then grabbed the box (It was pretty damn heavy..) emptied it out, and threw it over his shoulder. He then offered the most inspirational words said since the police announced Justin Bieber's arrest.

"Fuck it."

Lovi grinned a true smiled, took a deep breath and shouted out

**"SPAIN YOU FUCKING DUMBASS BASTARDIZING PIECE OF SHIT FOR GIVING ME THIS STUPIDASS BOX. AND FOR MAKING ME FUCKING WORK ALL THE CRAPPING TIME WITH THOSE FUCKING TOMATOES IN THE GODAMNED FIELD. AND YOUR STUPID ASS FRIENDLY SMILE THAT ALWAYS MAKES ME FUCKING HAPPY EVEN THOUGH I DON'T SHITTING WANT TO BE."**

He took another deep breath, smiled even wider and ran out of the room shouting down the stairs

**"VENEZIANO. BRUTTO FIGLIO DI PUTTANA BASTARDO, E SPERO CHE MANGIA MERDE E MORTE! ALSO GET POTATO BASTARD ON THE PHONE! I HAVE A FEW CHOICE WORDS FOR HIM!"**

Spain heard a feeble "Fratello! Sei tornato alla normalita!" and Romano slung more curses at poor Italy. Well, what did he care. His job here was done.

* * *

_**I'M SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG. I'VE BEEN WRITING SOMETHING ELSE I MIGHT POST, PLUS I HAD A CONVENTION, AND SCHOOL, AND JUST. I'VE BEEN HAVING A LIFE TO PUT IT IN BASIC TERMS. ANYWAY, SO YES, THIS IS THE ALTERNATE ENDING I HAD CONSIDERED FOR ROMANO'S SWEAR BOX, EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE BOTH THE SAME STORY RIGHT UP UNTIL THE PHONE CALLS. I'VE TAKEN TO CALLING THIS ONE, LOVI'S ABSTINENCE. SO HERE IT IS. AND IF THIS ONE SUCKS COMPARED TO THE OTHER ONE, FEEL FREE TO LEAVE ME A REVIEW ABOUT IT. IF YOU ACTUALLY LIKE THIS ONE, TELL ME. I MIGHT RIGHT ANOTHER ENDING I WAS CONSIDERING (IRONICALLY ENOUGH, WHILE I WAS WRITING THIS ONE).**_

_**.**_

_**Omfg, I forgot to turn off my capslock. THAT WAS ALL IN CAPS.**_** SHIT.**


End file.
